The Marauders: A Biography
by G.L. Fairywinkle
Summary: A biography of sorts! Find out about Peter's Squib"ness", Remus' social life (or lack there of), James' "hate" of Lily, and Sirius' psychotic mother!


A/n: Ok, This story has no real purpose. I was wanted to write something actually "written" by MWPP. So, I decided to have them write their own little summaries of their lives. I wrote Peter in here and I tried not to be too harsh with him or completely write him out. He was their friend too (unfortunately)…  
  
*NOTE* I don't own ANYTHING except for Caliope (Sirius' twin) and Sirius' psychotic mother (I always figured Sirius would be the one with the slightly twisted past, lol)  
  
A/n (again: Ok, well, I uploaded this a little bit ago, and I didn't know the bold and Italacs to show the different people writing wouldn't show up, so I will have to change my system! Ok, to showwho is writing I will put a little symbol by their lines.  
  
Here's the key:  
  
+ (Sirius)  
  
^ (James)  
  
= (Remus)  
  
~ (Peter)  
  
  
  
  
  
1.1.1 ^ The Marauders: A Biography  
  
+ (AKA The World's Greatest: The Life and Times of Sirius Black (and His Possy!)  
  
  
  
^ Hey! Now, we all had this great idea +(It was all me…)^ to write our own biography of sorts.=(And who would actually want to read it?) ^And you may not know who we are+(but you'll know me! Everyone does.)^ But read this anyway. I'm sure you'll find it, uh, intriguing! Yeah! +(all except for the section on wormtail.) ~(Hey! That's just wrong Sirius!)^ So, without any further ado, lets get on with it!  
  
~The Life +(What life?) ~and Times of Peter E. Pettigrew ^(the E stands for Eugene… +That's about the worst middle name I've ever heard…) ~Now if I could get a word in? +(Sorry wormy, can't do) ~Anyway! Peter E. +(Eugene!) ~Pettigrew born on a warm summer's eve +(summer's eve? You actually said summer's eve?) ~15 years ago. I was born to a full blood witch and wizard. +(And now you think you're better than every one cause you're pure-blood? *cough* SLYTHERYN! *cough cough* ) ~Of course, I thought I was full squib until I was eight after my Dad pushed me in the lake by our house to force magic out of me. =(Hmmm, nice father you've got there) ~Well, as you know, I met these three in my 1st year and the rest is history! +(Oh yes Peter, that was just SO incredibly intriguing!)  
  
=Ruled by the Moon: The Life of Remus J. Lupin+ (ooh! Nice little dramatic touch there, wouldn't you say?)  
  
=I was born in the dead of winter ^ (Summer's eve? Dead of winter? Whats up with this?)= about 16 years ago. But an incident when I was three changed my life.^ (oh the suspense!)= I had been bitten by a werewolf and I have been one ever since. And because of that, before Hogwarts, I never had much of a, shall we say, social life. ~(And you've got one now? ^Right, and you should talk Peter)= Thankfully Dumbledore let me intoHogwarts, and since then I've had some of the best times I've ever had! +(You know it!) =Yeah, its great to plan pranks and whatnot with these guys. Though, I'd like to think of myself as the voice of reason around here(maybe a bit less harebrained than either James or Sirius) So, alright, heres to more great times at Hogwarts, and beyond! +(now that's what I call intriguing!)  
  
^It's Potter-time! A brief summary of James A. Potter +(AKA The life of the Pot(ter) Head)  
  
^Hello all! +(Hello James!) ^Well, just to go along with the theme… I was born in the freaking hot, burning up, "Hey Mummy, I just went outside and my hair caught on fire!" kind of hot, summertime. =(Ha! Think that was a bit exaggerated James?) ^Now that's out of the way. Well, I first met Sirius at Diagon Alley before our 1st year +(at none other than the Joke Shop, go figure!) ^Then, we both met Remus on the train going to Hogwarts the first time. And, we all three met Peter after we played a joke on him (also in 1st year). Wasn't that the Treacle Tart that turned your hair blue? ~(Yes it was James!) +(Hey, whatever happened to those? We haven't used them forever!) ^We could always try one on Lily. Just for everyones information, Lily is the most snobbish and stuck up girl I have ever met and I can't stand her!!! =(Really James? I don't think I believe that. You know, seeing as you're in love with her…)^ Shut up Remus, I am not in love with her! Now, lets see, is there anything else worth mentioning? +(No there isn't! Shut up so I can go!)^ Fine Sirius go right ahead! I'm done. +(Awesome)  
  
+And now… it's time for…  
  
Storytime (well more like biography time) with Sirius!  
  
What comes to mind when you think of the words "Sirius Black"? Suave? Cool? Brains? smarts? Prankster? #1 ladies man? Damn sexy? ^(How about egotistical?) +Well, if these words don't, then they should. You know, I've got the brains. Who else could come up with pranks like mine? ^(Oh, I dunno, maybe somebody named James Potter?) +And, I'd be in the top three of my year (with James). But lets not focus on the whole school thing… And, you know, I got the looks. =(What is this, a personal ad?) +Ha ha, I got girls all over the place! ^(did I mention he was egotistical?) +But I don't have more than one at a time. I tried it once, it didn't work. And it seems to turn most girls off. Now what about some personal info? (I'll bet you're dying to know!) My full name is Sirius Orion Black.= (Was your mom busy looking out of a telescope when you were born? ^S.O.B. The perfect initials for Sirius! ~Yeah, we all know he is one!) +Well, of course I'm a S.O.B… Son of a Black! Well, anyway. Me and my twin Caliope (Cali for short) were born on a disgustingly beautiful spring day! And just so you know, I live with only my Dad cause my mum left when I was seven. Dad says she went kinda psychotic and mental and was stuck in St. Mungo's. =(You've got a psychotic mum? Well, that's interesting Sirius… *cough cough*)+ Well, enough talk of psychotic mum's, we're turning off the hot chick readers! So lets get back to the main dish… me! ^(he has an ego the size of Brazil, honestly!) +Speaking of that, don't ever even TRY to shatter my Brazil sized ego. That's when things get nasty. Cause when Sirius gets mad…  
  
Sirius….  
  
Gets….  
  
Even…  
  
And if you don't believe me ask that git Severus Snape. He's been the victim of me a lot. Why that thing was ever born is beyond me! ^(Sirius, will you try to end this within the next 5 months?) +In fact, I'll shoot for four and a half. Ok, fine, I'll end! (That's all for storytime with Sirius! Join us next time for another riveting edition!)  
  
^Riiiight Sirius, ok! Ok, maybe this wasn't all that intriguing +(my part was!)^ But you're amused aren't you? Come on! Admit it! You are! +(and I'm sure after reading my part you've fallen head-over-heels in love with me haven't you? =Lets just hope it's a girl…~ Watch it be Snape! +That would suck, I don't wanna steal your man Peter…)^ Well, that's all for this edition of Marauder biographies. But, I'd like to end with these three words…  
  
MARAUDERS FOR LIFE!!!!  
  
~(Sure thing…=exactly!…+You know!)  
  
  
  
A/n: I'm really sorry if that was confusing! I totally didn't know that the bold/italics/underlineing wouldn't show up when I uploaded it! Sorry! But please R&R! Thanks! 


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